Diversity Adjustment Agreement

In has come to my attention that several students in this class attended private schools and/or programs for gifted students. Furthermore, it has been suggested that a portion of our class is above average. This leads me to believe that other students may be below average. Obviously, this is unacceptable.

In the spirit of equity, to address this disparity, I shall implement several policy changes:

1. All students will be tested to determine their IQ
2. Documentation regarding all past educational opportunities shall be submitted forthwith
3. Students with a general public education background will receive an extra 10 minutes to complete examinations
4. Students who test below average on the IQ exam (see 1 above) will receive an additional 15 minutes to complete examinations.

Given this “adjustment” or affirmative action, I expect that course grades will converge and we will successfully achieve grade equality or Cosmic Justice.